Programming Note: This will probably be my last post of the day, because I’m driving to the City of Springs in a few hours to do some Driving Miss Daisy shit. It’s my baby’s birthday so I have to chauffeur her around while she yells at me to not drive so fast and to count to 5 at every stop sign before hitting the gas. I’ll be doing this for the next 2 days. Fun!
I’m leaving early since I’ve been told that the highways are full of Apocalypse-ready hos marching towards the safe lands. I know, perfect timing, especially since my apartment is in a mandatory evacuation zone. I’m taking my iPad, the only t-shirt I wear and saying a prayer that Typhoon Mina doesn’t break my favorite new bong. But anyway, fuck that bitch Mina…Los Baños, Laguna here I come!
Hollywood sex symbol Katherine Heigl ran some errands around LA yesterday, and I never realized how much she looks like a friend of mine. His name is Alex. This is how he dressed in 1998. He doesn’t have that ridiculous haircut anymore or those freshly cut-off Dockers but I bet he’ll get a kick out of this.
Going to bars is an incredible opportunity. That’s where you’ll meet your soulmates, nail them…and never call them again. Keep in mind that these chicks are drunk and hot…that’s a perfect cocktail—shake well, then sleep with. If you strike out, don’t give up hope. Always remember that there are new women turning 18 every day.
