Christy Turlington Seducing Me with Supermodel MILF Hotness

Maybe I’m just old as fuck and have a soft spot for Christy Turlington, because I used to jerk off to her back in the 90’s. Or maybe I just like the way she looks, despite being old and a mom, two things that are usually depressing, a fail, a flaw in a woman’s character and life choices.

Because looking at her in this summer’s Harper’s Bazaar, I think I’ve just learned how to fall in love again…like I wasn’t an angry, jaded pervert disappointed with everything sent my way…because let’s face it, she’s lovely as fuck and something I’d love to fuck.

Latest Pacific Rim Trailer Has More Mech Goodness (VIDEO)

I don’t know how it can be possible not to want to see this movie. The world is being attacked by giant monsters called Kaijus who’ve suddenly appeared from deep in the Pacific. What do we do? We build giant butt-kicking mechs to take them out. Let the butt-kicking commence!

Keira Knightley’s Bikini for Her Honeymoon

Skinny little Keira Knightley got married a couple of weeks ago and no one cared.

I assume these are some pics of her in a bikini on the beach from her honeymoon…you know, showing off her skinny little body before the baby starts to show…or more importantly, before the baby ravages her uterus, rips apart her vagina and fucking rapes her stomach so that it will forever be flabby…but she’ll be too hormonal to care and too busy celebrating her new milk-filled tits…as she takes that journey into motherhood…a journey I find horribly offensive.

So take it all in. She’s too disgustingly happy in love to not get knocked up, so this may be the last of her like this you’ll ever see. Enjoy.

There’s a Reason Iron Man Doesn’t Ask The Avengers For Help

One of the gripes that keeps coming up about “Iron Man 3” is that Tony Stark doesn’t call upon The Avengers to help him in his fight. They all get along, they’ve battled side by side, why wouldn’t he give them a ring? Well, there are many reasons but I like the humorous ones Dorkly came up with best. The fact is that the superhero team really isn’t all that amazing.

Cora Keegan is Naked and I Would Like To Be Her Best Friend

Cora Keegan is some amazing-looking young hipster model who I assume is from LA because that’s just the vibe I get.

She hasn’t done anything major or impressive in terms of her modeling, but she’s probably young and starting out. This nude photoshoot works perfectly for her to show the world how serious she is about this modeling shit…because if you don’t get naked for photographers in fashion, you ain’t shit…but more importantly, it works for me because I like her hot, thin body and hipster bush I’d love to get all matted with my cum…or saliva…or whatever she’d let me get it matted with.

She’s lovely and I’d like to be her friend…to take her on picnics and make her fall in love with me the way I just fell in love…with her nude pics.

Cora Keegan, you’ve won this round.